Emerging

I was talking with a friend yesterday about growth and evolution. I mentioned that I'd been doing some difficult personal work and we discussed how it is for us to grapple with those dark parts of ourselves. How in order to get clear and focused on who we truly are, we have to dig into and explore the depths. We must bravely gaze into the dark mirror and see what we can learn from it. 

But we also acknowledged that all that digging, while revealing and cathartic,  can also be very, very draining. What happens if you find you've dug yourself a hole so deep that you can't get out? How does one balance the good and the bad? 

I've found that it's easier to accept the struggle with the ease, the sorrow with the joy, and the pain with the pleasure when I remember that I am the one who is in control. I am the master of my thoughts. Good and bad. I decide which mirror I am looking into from moment to moment. It's not an all or nothing state of mind. 

I was walking in the woods alone yesterday thinking about all of this when I came upon a large, overturned tree. There was dirt clinging to the delicate  root system, leaves and other debris were now making a home there. I stuck my hand into it and was fascinated by the softness of the roots. These roots which were meant to be underground and hidden from view were now fully exposed. 

Out of the dark and into the light. The tree won't survive now that it's fallen. It's purpose has changed, but it still has a purpose. It still has work to do. 

Here I am as well. Still working in the dark but sticking my hand out occasionally to soak up the lightness. Accepting that I need both. My purpose may change from time to time as well, and that's not only ok, it's downright welcome.