What's in a name?

...that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet...

Or something close to that, from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. A quote I always knew, long before I read the play in high school English, because of my dad's love of the theater. And "a rose is a rose is a rose," attributed to Gertrude Stein. Another nod to my father on that one. But who you are and pride in your name was something my dad fought for and tried to instill in my brother and me, in addition to and outside of artistic implication. Our last name was a gift, essentially, and we were to honor it as such.

Of course as a kid none of that made any sense. I continually embarrassed my dad (a teacher in the pubic school system I attended) and failed his name on so many accounts. I enjoyed having my name associated with trouble (it was fun). Until I started to understand it, and then I became as fiercely protective of my last name as my father has been.

My first name took longer to like, let alone be something I felt protective over. The name "Lisa" always felt so boring. I knew plenty of Lisa's growing up, and none were particularly exotic. I liked names like Roxanne, Angela, and Poppy. Those sounded like adventurous girls who did interesting things! Lisa sounded like the girl next door who never did anything. It didn't help that I had to go to speech therapy in grade school (a fate worse than death, being called out of class each day in second grade to go to the speech therapist's office) to learn how to say "s" so that it didn't sound like "th."

Over the last decade, though, I've felt a shift. I actually like my name now. L's sound sumptuous, and I've mostly mastered the "s" sound (except when I'm tired) and can even make it whistle a little bit when I want. I love a cursive L, too, and the opportunity to finish my written name off with that dot above the i is a bonus. I like how my name sounds, how it looks when written, and how certain people say it. I like that maybe I am just a little bit responsible for making my name seem less like the girl next door and more like the girl who might persuade you into taking the adventure of your life.

My dad is right. We are our names. Best to fall in love with our names (and ourselves) rather than fight them.