It's that point in the year where it feels like everything is up in the air. It's the end of August, which means back to school mainly, which is like some kind of frenzy in most of the country. With no kids in the house and nobody starting college for the first time (although our daughter is going to a new college this year), I swear, the frenzy is just annoying. Maybe I'm a little wistful about it, though. I do miss my kids.
I had a plan to be back at the cottage for about two weeks, only the plan may change this week. There is the flux, the uncertainty, the winging it. My kid is sick, and there's not much that feels worse than being away from your kid, no matter his age, when he's hurting. Worry from afar feels worse than worry while laying eyes on the person you're worried about.
The first time my daughter went away to camp, I think she was in sixth grade, I likened it to walking around with one or two of my limbs removed. It's foreign, disorienting; but good practice for when they step into the world on their own. But here you are parenting away and making all choices and decisions for your young offspring, and then boom, almost overnight they are grown and on their own, doing all that for themselves and there you are without your limbs. And you sort out how to adjust.
I don't know if this image conveys what I'm writing about, but my limbs are still attached (that's good) and I am in the place (cottage) I love best. But part of me is sitting at my son's bedside, helping his sister care for him, and waiting to hear what the next step is before I rush home.
No comments:
Post a Comment